Who are we to give life advice and criticize others' decisions?

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I have noticed some behaviors recently, and they got me thinking.

1. Criticizing Others.

2. Giving Pieces of (Life) Advice to Friends.

3. Self-Reflect

<Encourage More, Before Criticize>

First, in my 20s and early 30s, I used to be very judgmental, singular, self-oriented, and supercilious.

And TRUST ME - I have given critiques to others and got critiques so much, especially during my 2 years of graduate school (all the mean girls you can imagine looking down and stepping down on others to “get higher.”)

*I am working on not judging too quickly - which is very hard for my characteristic.

I have learned to see all possible positive sides of other people—even if they make comments against me that hurt me at that moment.

Everyone has different values, standards, and priorities in life. I am not here to judge that. (YES, I finally realized this and am trying not to criticize.)

I am trying to be more open-minded, embrace the difference, and understand why you say that way at that moment and where you are coming from.

As long as we don’t break the law or hurt others (mentally, physically, emotionally), we should encourage and support each other rather than criticize.

<Share Your Advice When the Time is Right>

I respect people who are working their ass off, acing their games, walking the walk, being respected by their peers, and keeping their backbone.

I am also a complainer because I have high expectations. But I have learned one thing from my life working abroad: that’s my expectation/standard—I should keep it to myself. 

NO ONE CARES - how high or low my standards are.

They are busy bustling and hustling their lives.

It is great that we care about someone so much that we share our advice. But as I said earlier, everyone has different values and experiences. 

Your advice might only work for some or only for you.

If you have complained about your laziness, lack of self-control, etc., it’s your decision to make changes. 

We all know it is better to work out, eat healthy, and be open-minded. However, it is hard to take action—that first step is the hardest. 

So, please tell me one thing: you are DOING CONSISTENTLY for yourself and your growth.

Then, you can share your values and critiques about me, and I can see what I can adopt to improve myself. 

But please look at yourself first before you give out “life advice.”

<Self-Reflect>

I am not trying to say I am perfect.

I am still on my way, struggling every day and every moment to be better, healthier, nicer, and more positive.

To be rich, you need to learn how billionaires become rich.

To be healthier, you need to learn how to be and what to do.

If there is something you want to be and become, you need to learn how to.

Most importantly, it would be best if you did not stop at learning but put it into action.

It is going to take a lot of work. I fail every day, every moment. 

But I still try. I give myself time for self-reflection, to embrace, see through, and learn from it.

“IF” doesn’t have power.

“DO” has the power to bring about changes.